"You are always at lost" am I?

ONE once said..
"it is okay, i always think u r at lost"
so it keep me thinking, was i really at lost??
i blame myself for the immaturity and the thrill of playing around..
guess what goes around comes around..
none the less, i have gained alot from everything that happened..

at time in life i really dont know wat tmr will bring..
For example,10 years ago i cant even imagine myself being in KL...thought i will spend my entire life in Kerteh..(how naive was i)
10years from now?
Learnt to live for the ultimate purpose in life..
painful past shall remind me of my mistakes in life while spurring me on to change the present and future without being affected emotionally by them..
thank u all for ur presence in my life...
and for those who r already in the circle of my heart..
i want to thank u all for being here always for me...
my family,my jie, my BrOtHeRs~ and 3 of YOU...
love u all...
Amazing grace will lead me home!!

i vow to bounce back stronger and better...

She came then She left..

She raised me up since young..
She sees me thru my adolesence and teenage years..
She help mould to be who i am today...
My vain-ness came from her...since i was 4, she will make sure kor n i look like a superstar when we go kuantan or anywhere...
After coming back from SJK Chee Mong in my primary years, the 1st thing i did when i came home was to sit on the dinner table and enjoy fried fish with my fav chili tat she made...
When i was 14...half a year staying with sis n her in Kuantan..
---Mum n dad weren around except for the weekend..with her supervising us...i used to hate doing chores...
The family moved to PJ ...met with a serious accident back in 2003.
---I was there to witness the whole tragic incident.
---God gave her another 5 years as she suffers from brecial plexus plain..although i neglected her at times...

Nov 2008-Dec2008
i was given the chance to take care of her..bathe her,exercise with her etc etc...
it was really a whole new experience for me... i burst and shouted at her for the 1st few days...
but later on, i have the peace and joy to go thru these routines with her...
i just love to sit down n watch her go thru her routines.the way she washed her mouth,bathe.. that is this unique n systematic way of doing it..
i learnt to enjoy the process of taking care of her..
i taught her this song while i was walking her
"walk walk, walk walk in the light
walk walk, walk walk in the light
walking in the light of God"

no matter how weak she was at tat time, she just wanted to exercise..we will spur each other on..

now tat she is gone, went to a better place...
i have no regrets anymore...
i am jus thankful for the chance of taking care of her..
urge u ppl out there....appreciate each n everyone while u still can

see u one day my mama...

i love u

will definately miss our times together.talking bout life
will think of u always especially during chinese new year
will instill in me wat u passed down..
thanks mama...